April 4, 2025

From "Can't Do This" to "Just Watch Me" - Midlife Fitness with Laura Dow (Ep. 22)

From

Send Mind Your Midlife a note

Have you ever caught yourself saying "I'm too old for that" when it comes to fitness? Laura Dow, fitness expert and author of "Mind Your Movement," has heard these self-limiting beliefs from countless midlife clients—and she's on a mission to change the conversation around aging and physical activity.

In this enlightening discussion, Laura unpacks the subtle yet powerful ways ageism infiltrates fitness culture, from class names like "Chair Yoga for Seniors" to our own negative self-talk about what our bodies can and cannot do. With over 20 years of experience working specifically with midlife and older adults, she offers a refreshing perspective: focus on ability, not age.

BY THE TIME YOU FINISH LISTENING, YOU’LL DISCOVER:

✔ How to embrace midlife with confidence and vitality, 

✔ The unexpected ways strength training transformed not just your body, but your entire outlook on aging. 

✔ Why it’s never too late to start something new—and how to push past the fear of trying. 

✔ Practical ways to challenge the limiting beliefs society places on women over 40.

🎯 OMG Moment: The way you talk to yourself about aging shapes how you experience it. Shift your mindset, and you shift your reality.

Take Action

Want to feel stronger and more confident in midlife? Connect with Laura at stifftofit.com and get her book at cherylpfischer.com/read

Find Laura on YouTube and LinkedIn as well.

Why This Episode Matters

Aging doesn’t have to mean decline—it can mean growth, strength, and reinvention. Laura’s journey is proof that midlife can be your most powerful season yet.

🎧 Hit follow now and join me next week as we dive into another game-changing conversation on sports and mindset!

Find all podcast and coaching resources at cherylpfischer.com.

00:00 - Introduction to Fitness in Midlife

04:34 - Laura Dow's Journey to Fitness Coaching

07:43 - Understanding Ageism in Fitness

14:34 - Focus on Ability, Not Age

19:10 - Types of Movement for Midlife

24:25 - Self-Talk and Mindset in Fitness

33:26 - Start Small, Be Consistent, and Find Joy

WEBVTT

00:00:02.345 --> 00:00:15.012
When the subject of fitness and sports comes up, I always kind of chuckle to myself, because I will confess to you that I did not play any sports.

00:00:15.012 --> 00:00:18.550
I was on the flagline in high school.

00:00:18.550 --> 00:00:31.931
I did try taekwondo when my kids were younger and they were doing it, but I did not grow up playing sports and I did not have a self image that told me that I could, if that makes sense.

00:00:31.931 --> 00:00:39.219
So I had to work on some mindset there, and you'll hear me talk about that in other episodes, for sure.

00:00:39.219 --> 00:00:53.890
But, that being said, I feel so strongly about the fact that we need to keep ourselves as fit and healthy as possible in midlife and, of course, beyond.

00:00:53.890 --> 00:00:55.451
It doesn't just stop here.

00:00:55.451 --> 00:01:03.137
So this is something that I really, really am excited to talk to our guest about today.

00:01:03.137 --> 00:01:05.078
So let's go.

00:01:05.078 --> 00:01:26.841
Welcome to Mind your Midlife, your go-to resource for confidence and success, one thought at a time, unlike most advice out there, we believe that simply telling you to believe in yourself or change your habits isn't enough to wake up excited about life or feel truly confident in your body.

00:01:26.841 --> 00:01:36.126
Each week, you'll gain actionable strategies and oh my goodness powerful insights to stop feeling stuck and start loving your midlife.

00:01:36.126 --> 00:01:38.993
This is the Mind your Midlife Podcast.

00:01:41.941 --> 00:01:43.984
You heard me say that I never played sports.

00:01:43.984 --> 00:01:45.328
I'm not a sporty person.

00:01:45.328 --> 00:01:47.492
I am learning golf now.

00:01:47.492 --> 00:01:50.406
Of course that's walking I am.

00:01:50.406 --> 00:02:02.713
Also I have been doing pure bar for five years and it has absolutely transformed my strength and my core, which is huge for me, and so I'm so thankful for that.

00:02:02.713 --> 00:02:04.203
But I really never.

00:02:04.203 --> 00:02:06.850
I never have loved exercise.

00:02:06.850 --> 00:02:19.659
One of the reasons that classes work for me and this is the same reason that maybe a class or a personal trainer would work for you is that once I'm committed, I've signed up, I'm within the window.

00:02:19.659 --> 00:02:33.383
I can't cancel without some sort of penalty, then then I'm going to go, if that makes sense and maybe maybe you know exactly what I mean If I would just be going whenever I wanted to go, like my husband does.

00:02:33.383 --> 00:02:35.329
He likes to go, he wants to go.

00:02:35.669 --> 00:02:54.334
That's not me, but what we're going to talk about today is going to show us I think, maybe just underscore for us how important it is to do something, and you'll hear my guest, laura Dow, say maybe it's something very simple and easy.

00:02:54.334 --> 00:03:08.462
Ideally, it's something you enjoy, it's something and we need to get rid of the head trash about it, to get rid of the head trash about it.

00:03:08.462 --> 00:03:28.068
So we're here to talk about fitness in midlife and how that is related to all the self-talk stuff that might be going on in our head from messages of ageism that we might have taken in about what we should or shouldn't be doing at these ages that we're in now, or what we should or shouldn't be able to do, or we're telling ourselves we're too old for something all that kind of mess.

00:03:28.068 --> 00:03:32.222
We're going to address that today if that's something you're doing to yourself.

00:03:32.222 --> 00:03:44.711
So Laura Dow is the creator and owner of Stiff to Fit, which is a fitness, yoga and wellness business that works with older adults to help them maintain their movement.

00:03:45.050 --> 00:03:51.188
She also is the author of the book Mind your Movement, and this is Mind your Midlife.

00:03:51.188 --> 00:03:58.927
So, yeah, awesome, awesome title, and I will definitely have a link to her book in the show notes for you as well.

00:03:58.927 --> 00:04:09.108
She loves to exercise, but she also loves to read, cook, travel, enjoy some hot green tea, and she lives near Washington DC.

00:04:09.108 --> 00:04:10.711
So welcome Laura.

00:04:17.880 --> 00:04:18.583
Thank you, Cheryl.

00:04:18.583 --> 00:04:20.930
I'm very pleased to be here on this call with you.

00:04:21.800 --> 00:04:25.072
Yes, I'm looking forward to this conversation for sure.

00:04:25.072 --> 00:04:27.822
So let's just start this way.

00:04:27.822 --> 00:04:34.639
You work with midlife and older women in the area of fitness, so how did you end up doing?

00:04:34.740 --> 00:04:36.244
that.

00:04:36.244 --> 00:04:50.108
So I had a long career as a classical musician when I was younger and when I moved out to California in the early 2000s I hoped to replicate that career and wasn't able to for a variety of reasons.

00:04:50.108 --> 00:04:56.336
And at the same time I had been in my own health and wellness journey and had lost a significant amount of weight.

00:04:56.336 --> 00:04:59.927
So I was still working out and doing all the things that I had done previously.

00:04:59.927 --> 00:05:05.362
And then I thought you know, I'm spending so much time in the gym, somebody should pay me for all this time that I spend in the gym.

00:05:05.362 --> 00:05:07.785
And it happened surreptitiously.

00:05:07.785 --> 00:05:19.312
But I got a part time job in a woman's only health club near where I lived in California and I love talking to the ladies about their own health and wellness journey.

00:05:19.312 --> 00:05:26.946
And from that the owners noticed their two female owners noticed that and said Laura, we want you to do personal training.

00:05:27.259 --> 00:05:34.526
And I was like I'm not a personal trainer, I don't know how to do this and they said go get certified, we'll pay for it and then we'll, we will promote you.

00:05:34.526 --> 00:05:37.608
And that actually started everything.

00:05:37.608 --> 00:05:51.033
And the ladies that were in that club were predominantly middle-aged and older women and they were thrilled to have somebody that looked like them or that was their age or that had their life experience or whatever the commonality was.

00:05:51.033 --> 00:05:55.928
And from there, after that club closed, unfortunately.

00:05:55.928 --> 00:05:57.192
I adored that club.

00:05:57.192 --> 00:05:58.401
It was a great experience.

00:05:58.401 --> 00:06:12.966
I started working in regular commercial big box gyms and women would find me you know, older women would find me and they would be very happy to know that there was somebody that was, you know, closer to their demographic and their mindset and their lifestyle.

00:06:12.966 --> 00:06:15.391
So it happened from the beginning.

00:06:16.300 --> 00:06:19.348
You know what I love that and it it makes a difference.

00:06:19.348 --> 00:06:32.180
I actually do pure bar as one of my main workouts and, and because of where I happen to live, I end up mostly in classes with 20 somethings, maybe early 30 somethings, and listeners.

00:06:32.180 --> 00:06:43.007
You may or may not know, I am not that age, I'm in my 50s and I can hang in there with them, but I do love it when there are people around my age.

00:06:43.007 --> 00:06:48.766
It really it makes us feel I don't know more accepted or belonging or something I think.

00:06:49.247 --> 00:06:51.901
Yeah, yeah, I just I do think that it's a commonality.

00:06:51.901 --> 00:07:04.023
We've gone through maybe the same type of upbringing or the same kind of life experiences with the music or the shows, or just the values of that time period, cause, you know, every generation's a little different.

00:07:04.023 --> 00:07:06.889
So I've loved working with older women.

00:07:06.889 --> 00:07:15.706
It's been a real passion for me and I, as I said, just kind of fell into it at the beginning, but it's worked out very well for me and hopefully it's worked out great for my clients too.

00:07:16.269 --> 00:07:17.473
Yeah, I'm sure it has.

00:07:17.473 --> 00:07:31.331
And on that topic, as we're talking about liking to be with older women and helping older women, about liking to be with older women and helping older women, what we want to talk about today is focused around really ageism in this whole realm of fitness and sports.

00:07:31.331 --> 00:07:35.625
So when we even say the word ageism, what do we mean by that?

00:07:36.507 --> 00:07:39.413
Yeah, ageism is discrimination based on age.

00:07:39.413 --> 00:07:51.411
Now we look at ageism as discrimination against older folks, but it can be against younger people as well and there are some pretty good examples of both sides of it.

00:07:51.411 --> 00:07:57.413
But because of the demographic that I work with and I'm also not in my 20s or my 30s I'm older than you.

00:07:57.413 --> 00:08:04.072
So for the folks who can't see us, I represent the demographic of an active, older woman.

00:08:04.072 --> 00:08:09.122
I represent the demographic of an active, older woman.

00:08:09.122 --> 00:08:09.483
I look at ageism.

00:08:09.504 --> 00:08:26.672
The insidious part of ageism is the negative stereotypes that go along with being older, and this is particularly relevant in the realm of fitness or exercise or movement and for women, because women that are typically my age and older did not have access to team sports growing up.

00:08:26.672 --> 00:08:30.591
So Title IX came into effect in 1972.

00:08:30.591 --> 00:08:35.932
And there were court challenges to that, especially in the public school systems.

00:08:35.932 --> 00:08:37.385
They were receiving federal money.

00:08:37.385 --> 00:08:46.693
There were a lot of legal challenges to that so that when I got into high school and beyond, there still weren't really a lot of teams for women.

00:08:46.693 --> 00:08:51.192
They were just starting to happen, even though I was younger when Title IX was passed.

00:08:51.192 --> 00:08:54.409
So I still run into women who have never weight trained.

00:08:54.409 --> 00:08:55.666
They've never picked up a weight.

00:08:55.666 --> 00:09:02.214
I've run into women that I trained that have never been in a commercial big box gym, that never played a team sport.

00:09:02.214 --> 00:09:07.426
I mean, this is actually very common in the demographic and they do run into ageism.

00:09:07.426 --> 00:09:08.850
Shall I give you an example?

00:09:08.850 --> 00:09:11.740
Please do, absolutely Okay.

00:09:11.740 --> 00:09:14.025
So I'm on a task force right now.

00:09:14.025 --> 00:09:18.707
This subject is near and dear to my heart that's dealing with ageism in fitness.

00:09:18.707 --> 00:09:33.626
So we're in the middle of writing a white paper for the industry and we've done a lot of research, and so one of the things that we've found is that the it's interesting how group fitness instructors title their class names for older adults.

00:09:33.626 --> 00:09:38.243
So you will have something like this, and this is very this seems very mild.

00:09:38.243 --> 00:09:39.988
This doesn't seem like it's a problem at all.

00:09:39.988 --> 00:09:42.221
They'll have chair yoga for seniors.

00:09:43.024 --> 00:09:51.743
Now, I'm a registered yoga teacher and I have some real opinions about that, so let me share with you, if I may, a couple of things, because that sounds pretty innocuous, right?

00:09:51.743 --> 00:09:53.326
What's wrong with chair yoga for seniors?

00:09:53.326 --> 00:09:57.484
So I'm going to ask you, and I'll ask the audience, who are seniors?

00:09:57.484 --> 00:10:00.789
Are seniors 60 and up?

00:10:00.789 --> 00:10:02.373
Are seniors 65 and up?

00:10:02.373 --> 00:10:09.306
Do you know that we have 58 million people 65 years and older that all the way up past 100?

00:10:09.306 --> 00:10:14.104
So there's 58 million people in this demographic if we call 65 and older.

00:10:14.104 --> 00:10:14.666
Older.

00:10:14.666 --> 00:10:20.884
So like a 65 year old is going to have a lot of different ability than a 90 year old potentially.

00:10:20.884 --> 00:10:33.144
And somebody who's been sedentary all their life at 70 may be not in such good shape and not function well, versus someone who's 80 and has had a yoga practice for their entire life or for decades of their life.

00:10:33.144 --> 00:10:35.109
So chair yoga for seniors.

00:10:35.109 --> 00:10:36.972
So I'm not sure who that's for.

00:10:37.700 --> 00:10:42.011
Then the title of it it tells you that it's a chair yoga, so it's going to be seated.

00:10:42.011 --> 00:10:43.381
Well, that's not bad.

00:10:43.381 --> 00:10:48.793
If I have a leg injury and I can't stand and I'm 40 years old, I might want to take that class.

00:10:48.793 --> 00:10:54.379
Or if I have vertigo from maybe a car accident or whatever, I may want to take that class.

00:10:54.379 --> 00:10:59.472
So if I'm a younger demographic, should I not take that class because it's labeled for seniors?

00:10:59.472 --> 00:11:07.067
So our issue with class titles is that it doesn't tell you the level of ability that you need to take the class safely.

00:11:07.067 --> 00:11:16.827
So our focus in this task force and I fully agree with this is that focus on your ability, not your age yes, the number that you are doesn't matter.

00:11:16.827 --> 00:11:26.788
It matters, like what's your current functioning and what more do you want to do, or how do you want to live your life, and does your functioning match how you want to live your life?

00:11:27.830 --> 00:11:33.354
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

00:11:33.354 --> 00:11:34.014
And you know what?

00:11:34.014 --> 00:11:36.976
I don't think I'm sure I've seen a class titled that.

00:11:36.976 --> 00:11:45.923
I know I've seen a video titled that because I got one for my mom when she was having health issues and she needed to do something like in a chair, as you're saying.

00:11:45.923 --> 00:11:50.686
Sometimes it makes sense, but I never thought about the fact that.

00:11:50.686 --> 00:11:53.807
Yeah, who are we saying this is for and why are we saying that?

00:11:55.250 --> 00:11:57.893
Yeah, so I can get on my soapbox very easily about this.

00:11:57.893 --> 00:12:10.086
Because when you say chair yoga for seniors, if I went out on the street and did a little in-person interview, I think most people would come up with negative comments about what chair yoga for seniors is.

00:12:10.086 --> 00:12:11.884
They might say, oh it's gentle, oh it's easy.

00:12:11.884 --> 00:12:22.520
Oh it's easy, oh, it's for old people, which, by the way, there's no old people, there's older people but not old people, just like there's not young people, there's younger people.

00:12:22.520 --> 00:12:34.851
So I think the whole ageism issue is for us to get much more nuanced about how we refer to human life, the continuum of human life, that there's not young people and old people.

00:12:34.851 --> 00:12:40.583
There's tons of folks along the continuum and it's all relative.

00:12:40.583 --> 00:12:50.553
If I'm 64, which I am 64, then someone who's 65 is older, they're not old, and someone who's 54 is younger but they're not young.

00:12:50.553 --> 00:12:54.163
Does that make sense, the distinction that I'm trying to make?

00:12:54.163 --> 00:12:54.730
It?

00:12:54.831 --> 00:13:02.221
absolutely does, and someone who is 64 could be as active as someone who's in their 30s.

00:13:02.221 --> 00:13:06.816
Yet that 54-year-old could be really incapacitated.

00:13:06.816 --> 00:13:07.577
Who knows?

00:13:08.559 --> 00:13:10.143
Yeah, exactly, that's a great point.

00:13:10.143 --> 00:13:24.596
One of the things that we do mention in this white paper is that you absolutely cannot tell what somebody's history of exercise is, which is really important to how they may be functioning at this point, what their history of exercise is or what their ability is based on.

00:13:24.596 --> 00:13:27.889
Knowing what the age is, what the number is, right.

00:13:27.889 --> 00:13:37.400
So the insidious part of the ageism I mean there's blatant ageism where you're not given a job because you're your ex, you know, you're over the hill, which is a terrible phrase.

00:13:37.400 --> 00:13:54.332
I mean there's a whole range of phrases that you don't want to use anymore, that we used to use quite commonly, of someone based on their age for any reason.

00:13:54.332 --> 00:13:56.076
That's ageism and that's kind of crazy, because I hadn't thought of it like that.

00:13:56.076 --> 00:14:32.354
You know, prior to being 64, like maybe five to 10 years ago, I this was not on my radar, but as I age and as I continue to help my clients stay active and stay independent and stay functioning, it kind of just, you know, grates my cheese a little bit when we have fitness classes that are not you don't know going in what level of ability you're supposed to have, and we do have people coming into fitness into, like retirement communities now that are 70, that have worked out in commercial big box gyms for years, or they've run 10Ks for years, or they've skied in the Alps for years.

00:14:32.354 --> 00:14:36.500
I mean they've been active, a lot more active than previous demographics.

00:14:36.500 --> 00:14:46.155
So we need to look at something keep them functioning at the level to which they're accustomed, if there are no prevalent medical or health issues that get in the way.

00:14:46.155 --> 00:14:57.484
Yeah, so I'm a very big advocate of let's look at our language, let's look at these class, let's look at you know my clients will sometimes do the same thing.

00:14:57.484 --> 00:15:03.222
They won't dumb themselves down, but they'll undercut themselves about what's possible for them.

00:15:03.690 --> 00:15:05.577
You know this is not the pink dumbbell.

00:15:05.577 --> 00:15:17.177
I'm not a pink dumbbell trainer, and what I mean by that is that sometimes in retirement communities in particular, which I've worked in, you get two and three pound dumbbells.

00:15:17.177 --> 00:15:21.495
Now, if you have an injury or you have some reason why you can't lift more, that's fine.

00:15:21.495 --> 00:15:27.740
But we know that the human body adapts to the exercise that's being put on it over time.

00:15:27.740 --> 00:15:40.181
So at some point in time, if you're still using three pound dumbbells, you know a year from now, something's very wrong, unless you have a health issue that prevents you from moving up, because your body's gotten used to it in a couple of months.

00:15:40.181 --> 00:15:46.981
So we need to continue to challenge the human body within reason and safely, and that's kind of what I'm all about.

00:15:47.769 --> 00:16:04.097
Yes, yes, yes, I really agree with that and in my personal experience, the only types of workouts or exercise that have ever made a difference for me have been weight related either body weight or weight weight related.

00:16:04.097 --> 00:16:05.721
And you do have to keep increasing.

00:16:05.721 --> 00:16:08.072
100% agree, absolutely agree.

00:16:08.072 --> 00:16:19.174
I want to take this kind of in two different directions, so I'm going to pick one and then we'll see how we get back to the other one.

00:16:19.174 --> 00:16:56.331
So we've been talking about differing abilities at different ages and how it doesn't really go with the age, and when I was getting ready to chat with you, I went to my pod squad Facebook group our little group of pod fans and asked them if they would have any questions for you, and Sarah in the group said well, I don't know how to reconcile what we should be doing at this age whatever age 50, let's pick versus what we want to do or like to do.

00:16:56.331 --> 00:17:01.753
And to me, that question was perfect for this discussion, because what is this?

00:17:01.753 --> 00:17:03.316
What we should be doing, right?

00:17:04.499 --> 00:17:08.696
Yeah, it's a great question because that's a very, again, common question across.

00:17:08.696 --> 00:17:13.190
You know people who start to become more active with exercise.

00:17:13.190 --> 00:17:13.971
They all want to know.

00:17:13.971 --> 00:17:15.676
Well, there's too much information.

00:17:15.676 --> 00:17:17.221
I don't know where to begin.

00:17:17.221 --> 00:17:18.192
I don't know how to begin.

00:17:18.192 --> 00:17:20.037
So, yes, let me address that.

00:17:20.136 --> 00:17:22.531
So, first of all, I don't believe in the word should.

00:17:22.531 --> 00:17:34.540
I know that we have recommendations about exercising and I think that if you look at some of the organizations that promote their recommendations, which are reasonable recommendations, you'll go down a rabbit hole about.

00:17:34.540 --> 00:17:40.278
I can't possibly fit in 150 minutes a week of exercise, which is one of the standard recommendations.

00:17:40.278 --> 00:17:46.019
If you're doing nothing, 150 minutes seems like it's four days of exercising.

00:17:46.019 --> 00:17:47.262
It just seems overwhelming.

00:17:47.262 --> 00:17:59.176
And, let's face it, most of us have a very full life already with whatever it is that we're doing, and carving out that time to create more space for exercising can be very difficult.

00:17:59.176 --> 00:18:01.278
So I kind of throw should out the door.

00:18:01.278 --> 00:18:09.663
If you're an elite level athlete or you're preparing for an athletic event, then there are some shoulds maybe in that scenario or in that equation.

00:18:09.663 --> 00:18:11.464
But I'm not going to worry about that right now.

00:18:11.464 --> 00:18:12.766
I want to deal with Sarah's.

00:18:12.766 --> 00:18:15.928
You know, the more basic issue, which is how do you get started?

00:18:15.928 --> 00:18:17.393
Like, what do you do to get started?

00:18:17.393 --> 00:18:19.840
I would say start where you're at.

00:18:20.142 --> 00:18:21.164
So what does that mean?

00:18:21.164 --> 00:18:24.513
That means, well, is she doing any exercising now?

00:18:24.513 --> 00:18:27.321
And if she's doing exercising now, what is she doing?

00:18:27.321 --> 00:18:28.632
Is it working out okay?

00:18:28.632 --> 00:18:30.115
What are her goals?

00:18:30.115 --> 00:18:35.757
Because there's movement for movement's sake, which is important, like daily movement is important.

00:18:35.757 --> 00:18:38.660
So a 10-minute walk, that could be daily movement.

00:18:38.660 --> 00:18:42.740
Cooking in a kitchen for a couple of hours, that could be daily movement.

00:18:42.740 --> 00:18:49.022
Playing with grandchildren for a while we know how vigorous that can get that's daily movement.

00:18:49.022 --> 00:18:52.803
Formal movement is another part of the equation.

00:18:52.803 --> 00:18:55.311
So does Sarah do a barre class?

00:18:55.311 --> 00:18:56.796
Does Sarah take a yoga class?

00:18:56.796 --> 00:18:59.330
Does she have a weight training thing that she does?

00:18:59.330 --> 00:19:02.097
Does she go for a walk with a friend after dinner for 30 minutes?

00:19:02.097 --> 00:19:06.373
After that, I would say what does Sarah like to do?

00:19:07.134 --> 00:19:20.770
So the part about liking to do something it's important, as you begin to think about more movement, that it's pleasurable in some degree, some way, shape or form, or else you're not going to do it.

00:19:20.770 --> 00:19:24.842
If it's really miserable, why were we spending the time or the money to do it?

00:19:24.842 --> 00:19:32.136
So it's got to have some kind of pleasure to it For me as a fitness professional, I have pleasure in moving my body.

00:19:32.136 --> 00:19:32.838
That feels good.

00:19:32.838 --> 00:19:35.555
I have pleasure in being strong, so that feels good.

00:19:35.555 --> 00:19:37.036
But people are not me.

00:19:37.036 --> 00:19:40.220
That's why people like me exist, right, yes.

00:19:41.111 --> 00:19:45.082
So I think it's really important to find something that you enjoy doing.

00:19:45.082 --> 00:19:53.061
Now, if you hate exercise altogether, which a lot of my clients do, then find a workout buddy, somebody that you enjoy their company.

00:19:53.061 --> 00:19:56.457
You've got to find a hook of some sort or other, right?

00:19:56.457 --> 00:20:05.873
So if the exercising itself doesn't do it for you, but you know you should be doing it, figure out a scenario that is going to be tolerable for you.

00:20:05.873 --> 00:20:10.113
So, maybe looking forward to a walk with a friend, maybe you have a dog, you have to walk the dog.

00:20:10.113 --> 00:20:16.077
Maybe you have a dance class that you really enjoy or you dance in your kitchen, that's fine.

00:20:16.077 --> 00:20:28.518
So it's the working with yourself that's really critical, and forgetting about what works for you or what works for me, that might not work for Sarah and probably won't work for Sarah.

00:20:28.518 --> 00:20:34.394
So she's got to kind of use a little bit of brain cells to figure out, well, who's Sarah and what is Sarah like?

00:20:34.796 --> 00:20:41.462
Right, and it makes me think about a quote a confused mind says no meaning.

00:20:41.462 --> 00:20:49.292
If we throw too much information at people, you can't make a decision, so we don't do anything.

00:20:49.292 --> 00:20:50.457
And maybe that's what people get stuck in with this.

00:20:50.457 --> 00:20:51.460
I, maybe I'll do this, maybe I'll do that.

00:20:51.460 --> 00:20:52.423
I don't know which one's better.

00:20:52.423 --> 00:20:53.948
Yeah, yeah.

00:20:54.308 --> 00:20:57.038
Yeah, I would say that any movement is better than no movement.

00:20:57.038 --> 00:20:59.253
So we had talked about.

00:20:59.253 --> 00:21:02.521
You know what's one of the top tips that you can give?

00:21:02.521 --> 00:21:06.480
Well, more movement is better than no movement within reason.

00:21:06.480 --> 00:21:12.423
And yes, of course, you want to be a good student or you want to tick the box off you.

00:21:12.423 --> 00:21:13.836
Okay, I got movement today.

00:21:13.970 --> 00:21:15.454
So what are the things to look for?

00:21:15.454 --> 00:21:16.940
Rhythmic movement.

00:21:16.940 --> 00:21:20.039
So we call that cardio or aerobic exercise, it used to be called.

00:21:20.039 --> 00:21:23.380
So walking is one of the easiest ways to get rhythmic movement.

00:21:23.380 --> 00:21:25.656
Biking is rhythmic movement.

00:21:25.656 --> 00:21:27.717
Swimming is rhythmic movement.

00:21:27.717 --> 00:21:29.569
Dancing is rhythmic movement.

00:21:29.569 --> 00:21:39.333
So that's all of those things, and we can come up with some more.

00:21:39.333 --> 00:21:39.654
Those are great.

00:21:39.674 --> 00:21:41.281
Okay, to do those more days of the week than not would be a really good goal.

00:21:41.281 --> 00:21:42.728
If you're not exercising at all, okay, 10 minutes, don't worry about the.

00:21:42.728 --> 00:21:44.393
You know whatever the organization says.

00:21:44.393 --> 00:21:54.222
And then weight training is really critical, like being able to manage your body weight through different positions with good form, good posture, you know, not hurting yourself.

00:21:54.222 --> 00:22:01.761
So some kind of weight training routine would be really helpful as well, and that could be as little as 10 minutes every other day.

00:22:01.761 --> 00:22:02.771
It doesn't have to.

00:22:02.771 --> 00:22:03.776
You don't have to go to a gym.

00:22:03.776 --> 00:22:04.739
You don't have to spend the money.

00:22:04.739 --> 00:22:07.753
You don't have to, you know, worry about clothes or other people.

00:22:07.753 --> 00:22:09.695
You just you can do stuff at home.

00:22:09.695 --> 00:22:14.803
Body weight stuff at home works really well and during pandemic we didn't have health clubs anyway.

00:22:15.222 --> 00:22:17.226
So, a lot of us did work out at home.

00:22:17.226 --> 00:22:23.510
You can get a video, you can have a membership to somebody's channel and do weight training at home.

00:22:23.510 --> 00:22:35.788
Then we want something to do with your core, which the bar, I'm sure helps you a lot with core, because you've got to have really good muscle control, so you're getting a lot of good stuff I'm sure helps you a lot with core because you've got to have really good muscle control, so you're getting a lot of good stuff right in your barre class.

00:22:35.788 --> 00:22:36.529
And then some stretch and mobility.

00:22:36.529 --> 00:22:38.074
So some people take yoga class.

00:22:38.074 --> 00:22:38.714
That would work.

00:22:39.155 --> 00:22:45.625
But just as we get older, one of the things that we do need to do is we need to prepare the body better for working out.

00:22:45.625 --> 00:22:49.192
So when we were 20, maybe we could jump right in and just go running.

00:22:49.192 --> 00:22:53.078
We didn't have to do any kind of nothing, we didn't have to warm up at all.

00:22:53.078 --> 00:23:07.851
But when we're 50, 60, 70, 80, those joints have seen a lot of life, and so you need to work those joints through their range of motion, which, if that sounds like gobbledygook, all that means is just some unweighted movements with your arms, with your legs.

00:23:07.851 --> 00:23:09.913
It's very simple.

00:23:09.913 --> 00:23:13.338
You need about five to 10 minutes of that, and then you're pretty much good to go.

00:23:14.519 --> 00:23:22.560
That's a great overview and if you're listening to this right now, maybe you save this episode or you rewind back and jot down what Laura just said.

00:23:22.560 --> 00:23:29.534
That was a great overview, because I feel like, okay, I'm thinking about sort of these boxes you gave us, which ones am I checking?

00:23:29.534 --> 00:23:31.458
I need to do better with my stretching.

00:23:31.458 --> 00:23:40.621
I know that and I do notice it seems a little more challenging to be flexible now.

00:23:40.621 --> 00:23:41.894
I do notice that.

00:23:41.894 --> 00:23:43.095
So I know what you're saying.

00:23:43.095 --> 00:23:44.836
We need a little bit more maybe.

00:23:46.509 --> 00:24:00.285
But now that I just said that the other direction I want to take this conversation is self-talk, and maybe we need to be careful with the things we say because, as I'm saying it's harder now, I'm thinking to myself well, should I be saying it's harder now?

00:24:00.285 --> 00:24:17.794
So I know you work with a lot of your clients on this and we're sort of being bombarded, as we were talking about earlier, with these messages that now we're old or we can't do this or that, and it's young people we see being fit.

00:24:17.794 --> 00:24:19.618
There's just a mix of everything.

00:24:19.618 --> 00:24:23.770
So how does self-talk and mindset come into it for you?

00:24:24.491 --> 00:24:28.502
Well, I could do like a week and a half on this, because self-talk is just so critical.

00:24:28.502 --> 00:24:45.477
I mentioned at the beginning, when you asked about ageism I use the word insidious and that was about the negative stereotypes that we use to pigeonhole people based on the number that they are, their chronological age, rather than what their ability is or what their history of movement is.

00:24:45.477 --> 00:25:02.182
So the same thing is true with self-talk, and it's probably even worse because at this point we've lived with ourselves for however many decades, and sometimes we're not even aware of the messages we're sending ourselves, and the messages that we send ourselves are often based on the messages we're receiving.

00:25:02.182 --> 00:25:07.982
So it's this big, can be this big negative feedback loop in a really impactful way.

00:25:07.982 --> 00:25:09.694
That's not good eventually.

00:25:09.836 --> 00:25:15.898
So self-talk, I think, becoming more aware and slowing down, which is a problem.

00:25:15.898 --> 00:25:39.932
In Washington DC, which is where I'm located, I have a lot of clients that have very high level jobs and that are very accomplished and that are go, go, go, and their jobs require a lot of intellectual ability, so their brains are always on and this this having having the time and the space to just sit and take a breath and just pause and reflect is basically non-existent with a lot of the clients that I work with.

00:25:39.932 --> 00:25:43.718
So getting them to slow down and just well, what do you feel in your body?

00:25:43.718 --> 00:25:51.057
Okay, and it's a fairly easy thing to go from what are you feeling in your body to what is your mind saying about this.

00:25:51.980 --> 00:25:53.853
You know, what, what, what kind of mess?

00:25:53.853 --> 00:25:55.236
What are you saying inside?

00:25:55.236 --> 00:25:57.221
Sometimes they actually say it out loud.

00:25:57.221 --> 00:25:59.333
If they say it out loud, I can deal with it.

00:25:59.333 --> 00:26:01.916
It's like, okay, you just said that you didn't think you do.

00:26:01.916 --> 00:26:09.836
You related this exercise somehow to you're too old for this or you can't do this because of your age, like what's that all about?

00:26:09.836 --> 00:26:12.762
I mean, you just did a 10 pound bicep curl.

00:26:12.762 --> 00:26:16.334
You know clearly you can do it, so you just disproved yourself.

00:26:16.334 --> 00:26:17.315
Are you aware of that?

00:26:17.315 --> 00:26:21.160
So I try to point out the disconnect when it comes out of their mouth.

00:26:21.160 --> 00:26:27.413
We need to have a conversation and I try to kindly, because I don't think people not to be up in their face.

00:26:27.413 --> 00:26:29.200
I don't think that that approach really works.

00:26:29.200 --> 00:26:37.571
But kindly say, are you realizing that you just said one thing but your body did something different that was in direct contradiction to what you said.

00:26:37.571 --> 00:26:41.757
You know there's a disconnect, so maybe you really are more capable than what you think.

00:26:42.698 --> 00:26:50.692
And again, people hire trainers because the trainer will generally have an ability to see what's possible for that client.

00:26:50.692 --> 00:26:52.778
So it's my job to challenge.

00:26:52.778 --> 00:26:56.113
If you were my client, it would be my job to assess you.

00:26:56.113 --> 00:26:57.035
Where are you at?

00:26:57.035 --> 00:27:01.532
What's going on, what's affecting your exercising, what are your goals?

00:27:01.532 --> 00:27:16.035
And then it's my job to help you on that journey, to get your goals and to be able to walk that fine line of challenging you enough, challenging your body enough to make gains, but not challenging you so much that you have an injury.

00:27:16.035 --> 00:27:22.758
You're unsafe and it's hard sometimes, especially with new people that you don't have a long-term relationship with.

00:27:22.758 --> 00:27:36.509
But, yeah, self-talk and self-image and the whole, you know, whatever your internal dialogue is, I would highly recommend that people just take a breath and look at what they're saying to themselves, particularly when they're getting frustrated or stressed.

00:27:37.131 --> 00:28:06.380
Yeah, I like sort of the juxtaposition if I may use a big word, I think I'm using it right of this where you're helping them exercise and I think maybe we all need to hear that is it's not a big race to do the most exercise in the most little, the littlest time.

00:28:06.380 --> 00:28:14.696
We need to pay attention to what's going on in our bodies, of course, so we don't get injured, but also all the the head stuff, yeah.

00:28:15.076 --> 00:28:19.492
Yeah, I think the two things come to mind when you're, when you rephrase that Thank you.

00:28:19.492 --> 00:28:35.038
One is this is a famous story in my story, my repertoire of client stories I have a client, a judge in DC, who likes to have lists and check off the list, check off the box on the list, and so I'll make up her name.

00:28:35.038 --> 00:28:43.503
I would say to her okay, michelle, okay, so you just checked off the box of your exercising.

00:28:43.503 --> 00:28:46.038
I said, but let's back up here for a second.

00:28:46.038 --> 00:28:51.117
It's not about checking the box off, it's about were you paying attention to how your body was moving?

00:28:51.117 --> 00:28:52.301
Were you breathing?

00:28:52.301 --> 00:28:54.156
Were you aware of what you were feeling?

00:28:54.156 --> 00:28:56.979
Were you thinking, gosh, I'm so strong, I can do this.

00:28:56.979 --> 00:29:00.059
I mean, it's not just do, do, do, do, do.

00:29:00.059 --> 00:29:06.597
It's also let's have a connection here of the brain and the body, the mind and the body together.

00:29:06.597 --> 00:29:09.423
And I've been after her for a while.

00:29:09.423 --> 00:29:10.432
She's a long-term client.

00:29:10.432 --> 00:29:14.270
I've been after her for a while and now she laughs when I talk about the list.

00:29:14.270 --> 00:29:20.324
She knows exactly where I'm going, but more often than not she's much more present to what she's doing.

00:29:20.483 --> 00:29:26.979
So the second part of your reframe that came to mind was that, in my background as a yoga teacher.

00:29:27.299 --> 00:29:34.011
We spend a lot of time about the breath and about being present to how we're feeling and what, not only emotionally, mentally, but physically.

00:29:34.071 --> 00:29:55.914
That's really the starting point, and the breath is the starting point in yoga, at least the way I was trained and so that's particularly difficult for anybody who lives in an urban environment, who, it's like on, you have to be on all the time just to be able to take a breath and to just kind of slow down and just kind of like stop for a second and pause and be still.

00:29:55.914 --> 00:29:58.703
I mean, that's really difficult for a lot of people.

00:29:58.703 --> 00:30:02.480
So I come to training with some extra tools in my toolbox.

00:30:02.480 --> 00:30:08.260
I was never an athlete myself, as I mentioned about Title IX, so I did not.

00:30:08.260 --> 00:30:15.273
Typically a lot of trainers come with a big athletic background or they've played sports or whatever the scenario is, and I didn't have any of that.

00:30:15.273 --> 00:30:22.039
I had the discipline of music as my background when I came, and also social work when I came into the field.

00:30:22.039 --> 00:30:28.502
So yoga has helped me enormously with helping clients to, you know, kind of slow down and pay attention.

00:30:29.849 --> 00:30:31.452
Interesting, interesting.

00:30:31.452 --> 00:30:41.097
And it's funny because on the day we're taping this, I just released a podcast episode about the power of music and how good it is for your brain and your body.

00:30:41.097 --> 00:30:43.121
So isn't that funny that it's all connected.

00:30:44.163 --> 00:30:45.505
It is all connected for sure.

00:30:46.631 --> 00:30:55.219
I think this has been absolutely packed full of great information and I'm going to ask you in a minute to give us like our big thing to remember.

00:30:55.219 --> 00:31:09.665
But first, before you help us pull all that together, because I might need help, tell me where, if someone's listening and they want to know more about you or connect with you in some way, where can they do that?

00:31:10.769 --> 00:31:19.483
Sure, so my company is called Stiff2Fit S-T-I-F-F-T-O-F-I-Tcom, and that's my website.

00:31:19.483 --> 00:31:20.484
You can find me there.

00:31:20.484 --> 00:31:23.173
There's a contact form if you'd like to reach out.

00:31:23.173 --> 00:31:28.513
If you're in the DC area, you can just Google me and you can probably find me online.

00:31:28.513 --> 00:31:29.998
I'm also on LinkedIn.

00:31:29.998 --> 00:31:32.424
I'm very responsive to LinkedIn requests.

00:31:32.424 --> 00:31:34.830
So I'm Laura Dow and you'll see my picture.

00:31:34.830 --> 00:31:37.355
I'm if you see the lady in the kayak, that's me.

00:31:37.876 --> 00:31:42.065
I love it, and then I'm also on YouTube.

00:31:42.065 --> 00:31:48.674
So if you're looking for some actual examples of some exercises that I recommend, I do have a short yoga practice.

00:31:48.674 --> 00:31:51.261
That's chair yoga, but it's chair yoga.

00:31:51.261 --> 00:31:52.816
It's chair yoga for anybody.

00:31:52.816 --> 00:31:55.097
It's chair yoga for people who need chair.

00:31:55.097 --> 00:31:57.915
I'm not against chair yoga, so don't send me hate mail.

00:31:57.915 --> 00:31:59.170
I like chair yoga.

00:31:59.170 --> 00:32:01.618
It has its place in the universe.

00:32:01.618 --> 00:32:03.111
Don't send me hate mail.

00:32:03.111 --> 00:32:03.491
I like chair yoga.

00:32:03.491 --> 00:32:04.213
It has its place in the universe.

00:32:04.213 --> 00:32:07.300
What I'm against is labeling it based on age rather than based on what does a person need.

00:32:07.300 --> 00:32:21.858
You know, somebody who's 20 might need to be sitting in a chair for lots of different reasons, but I am on YouTube under Stiff to Fit and I have the chair yoga and I have a standing yoga practice, as well as a couple of videos on some mobility practices.

00:32:22.589 --> 00:32:23.453
Oh fantastic.

00:32:23.453 --> 00:32:29.859
Yeah, mobility I'm going to have to go and look at, because mobility, I can tell, is going to be the thing I need to focus on for sure.

00:32:30.890 --> 00:32:35.301
And I also I want to mention my book, of course, because that was a big deal for me in 2024.

00:32:36.372 --> 00:32:38.499
Yes, tell us just briefly a little bit more, yeah.

00:32:39.150 --> 00:32:39.451
Sure.

00:32:39.451 --> 00:32:41.578
So I've written a book called mind, your movement.

00:32:41.578 --> 00:32:49.792
It's six essential physical and mental tools to stay active as you age.

00:32:49.792 --> 00:33:07.569
It's on Amazon and Kindle and on paperback, and it basically I wanted I'm thinking in terms of my legacy and I wanted to take the 20 years plus of being in the fitness and yoga industry and encapsulate it into some common sense information that anybody reading the book could pick at least one thing that's immediately actionable from the book.

00:33:07.569 --> 00:33:10.999
I have client vignettes that are based on true client stories.

00:33:10.999 --> 00:33:23.030
Their identities are camouflaged so that you can see that there are real people with real problems and how we dealt with it, and the book is kind of split up between some physical tools and mental tools.

00:33:23.030 --> 00:33:34.597
So some of the self image things I talk about, self talk, but also how to get your mind on board so that your mind is supporting your body and that your body is responding to your mind, so that you're not at war with yourself.

00:33:35.441 --> 00:33:50.898
You know what I I'm so glad that we brought that into the discussion, Because when I saw originally when we met that into the discussion, because when I saw originally when we met that the title of your book was Mind your Movement, I said, well, that's a good fit for Mind, your Midlife podcast, isn't it Absolutely Excellent?

00:33:50.898 --> 00:33:55.752
Well, as we're trying to wrap all this together, what would you say?

00:33:55.752 --> 00:33:57.798
I always call it the OMG moment.

00:33:57.798 --> 00:34:02.359
What would you say is the thing that people need to remember from this episode?

00:34:03.372 --> 00:34:06.383
I would say a couple of tidbits of common sense information.

00:34:06.383 --> 00:34:08.871
First of all, more movement is better than no movement.

00:34:08.871 --> 00:34:18.570
So if you're laying on the couch for hours, get off the couch every hour and do a something, whether that's you know, dance around your kitchen for two minutes, whether it's you know.

00:34:18.570 --> 00:34:21.398
People poo-poo very small efforts.

00:34:21.398 --> 00:34:23.492
They say, oh, that's not going to make any difference.

00:34:23.492 --> 00:34:30.577
And I'm here to tell you that if you do small things consistently, they morph into big things over time.

00:34:30.577 --> 00:34:48.614
So and that's one of the themes of the book is that if you have to be, take a small step that you can do and it doesn't matter if it's you know, don't compare yourself to other people, it doesn't matter.

00:34:48.614 --> 00:34:53.070
Take something you can do now, today, and then do that consistently every day or every other day, whatever your consistent is, and then do that for weeks and months and you will start to see change.

00:34:53.070 --> 00:34:56.458
That's part of change is to do something different.

00:34:56.458 --> 00:34:59.512
So more movement is better than no movement within reason.

00:34:59.512 --> 00:35:04.322
Start now is another common sense idea.

00:35:04.322 --> 00:35:08.860
And try to do things that you feel like you're going to be successful at.

00:35:08.860 --> 00:35:10.175
That's really important too.

00:35:10.175 --> 00:35:12.097
This gets into that self-image thing.

00:35:13.291 --> 00:35:14.335
I have clients again.

00:35:14.335 --> 00:35:15.018
I live in DC.

00:35:15.018 --> 00:35:29.476
It's kind of a crazy place where people who have been on the couch for months because of pandemic or they lost their job or whatever the scenario may be, they had an illness they then decide, okay, I've had enough of this, I've been on the couch for a year, I want to go run a 5k.

00:35:29.476 --> 00:35:37.918
Well, please don't don't go from zero to 5k in the space of a month like, like, let's have some realistic, you know, thoughts here.

00:35:37.918 --> 00:35:43.385
Let's have a plan which is where trainers come in or a physical therapist or whoever your fitness.

00:35:43.385 --> 00:35:45.927
You know people may be that you can reach out to.

00:35:45.927 --> 00:35:48.472
I can design a very nice plan for you.

00:35:48.472 --> 00:35:51.222
You know, couch to 5k you can Google that online.

00:35:51.222 --> 00:35:53.070
But you know it's very doable.

00:35:53.070 --> 00:36:00.655
But it has to be done intelligently or you put yourself at risk for injury and you also may not like the process very much at all.

00:36:00.655 --> 00:36:07.378
So that celebration part of that success part, I think is really key to helping people stay consistent.

00:36:07.780 --> 00:36:12.960
Yes, I fully agree, and those are things that maybe people can easily remember too, which is really important.

00:36:12.960 --> 00:36:17.746
We are all surrounded by information all the time, so we need things that stick in our head.

00:36:17.746 --> 00:36:25.398
Oh, I remember when Laura said that more movement is better than nothing, so let me just get up off the couch at the end of this show, or whatever.

00:36:25.398 --> 00:36:27.081
Yes, fully agree.

00:36:27.081 --> 00:36:30.315
Well, laura, this has been a fascinating discussion.

00:36:30.315 --> 00:36:32.969
Thank you so much for joining me Well.

00:36:33.090 --> 00:36:34.494
thank you very much for having me.

00:36:34.494 --> 00:36:36.340
I've thoroughly enjoyed our conversation.

00:36:37.371 --> 00:36:40.759
There was so much to take away from that discussion.

00:36:40.759 --> 00:37:17.731
I feel like I understand a little bit better what to watch for in messages I'm getting from the media social media, other people about fitness at various ages, and messages I'm getting from myself about fitness at various ages, and I'm just going to kind of let that simmer and chew on that for a little bit, because it's powerful what we're telling ourselves, no matter whether it came from inside or it came from outside.

00:37:17.731 --> 00:37:26.436
It's powerful, and I appreciate Laura's message on that and also the list of the different types of activities that would be good for us to be doing.

00:37:26.436 --> 00:37:29.242
Oh, my goodness, fantastic.

00:37:29.242 --> 00:37:32.356
Save this episode, share it with your friends.

00:37:32.356 --> 00:37:34.481
I think we can all get something out of it.

00:37:35.050 --> 00:37:43.893
Go to CherylPFishercom slash, read and grab Laura's book, or at least take a look at it, and then, if you want to come, hang in the pod squad with us.

00:37:43.893 --> 00:37:47.251
You will see the link for that Facebook group in the show notes as well.

00:37:47.251 --> 00:37:56.054
Mind your midlife pod squad and make sure you have hit the follow button, because we're going to continue this theme sort of next week.

00:37:56.054 --> 00:38:12.003
We're going to talk about mindset when it comes to sports and activities and basically dig deeper into this idea of are we getting frustrated when we're trying to learn something new?

00:38:12.003 --> 00:38:13.576
What do we do about that?

00:38:13.576 --> 00:38:15.376
How do we become resilient?

00:38:15.376 --> 00:38:19.036
Related to that, so I can't wait for you to join me.

00:38:19.036 --> 00:38:20.320
Oh, my goodness.

00:38:20.320 --> 00:38:24.681
Let's keep creating confidence and success, one thought at a time.

Laura Dow Profile Photo

Laura Dow

Laura Dow is creator and owner of Stiff To Fit, a fitness, yoga and wellness business dedicated to helping older adults maintain and improve their movement. In 2024, Laura published her first book "Mind Your Movement: Six Essential Physical and Mental Tools to Stay Active As You Age" to share her 20 years of experience and knowledge on how to move better and how to get started with an exercise routine. Besides her professional life, Laura loves to exercise, read, cook, travel and enjoy a good cup of hot green tea. She lives in the Washington DC area.